Boulevard of Broken Dreams
by DaphneG
Summary: A prequel to How Long is Forever. (Deleted the song lyrics) Angsty RobinStarfire story.


Author's Note: I know this is almost a cliché topic already, but I just really wanted to do it anyway. Don't review telling me this is cliche, I know that! On the other hand, if you have constructive criticism, please share. This is my first attempt at writing an angsty fic, but it is definitely not my first Rob/Star fiction.

(I deleted the song lyrics)

**_"Boulevard Of Broken Dreams"_**

Anyone remarking on the atmosphere would have said it was blissful and serene. Ironically, nothing could be heard except for Robin's loud yells as he mercilessly attacked the punching bag, kicking and chopping. He couldn't stop nor did he want to remember. With one final slam, the rope that held the bag, dangling in mid air, snapped and gave way. Robin collapsed on the bitter cold ground, breathing hard, as the sweat dripped from his forehead and almost every other part of his body. This wasn't working. He was still being reminded, and he missed her with every fiber of his being. Robin slammed his forehead on the ground, continuing to pant. Twenty years ago, the only being that had ever brought him joy disappeared. She was the only person, the only one that ever had the patience to care for him, and the ability to love him.

'As if losing my parents wasn't enough, you had to take Starfire away from me too,' he cursed out loud. Starfire, his Starfire, disappeared into the worm hole, and he hadn't seen her since. Today was the anniversary of her disappearance.

To the rest of the world he was now Nightwing, the masked vigilante. Late at night, when the city was asleep, he would prowl and stalk the streets. Ruthlessly, he pursued criminals, bringing every one of them to justice. Some saw him as a hero, the savior of the city. Others saw him as a ruthless, heartless avenger.

'They don't know anything about me. And I wouldn't have it any other way,' he thought angrily, as he got up from the floor. 'They know nothing about why the Titans split up, and they know nothing about why I am this way. I'm fine with walking along this road alone!' Fifteen years ago, the titans each went their own ways. For five years, they tried to continue, to protect the city. They wanted to try to stay together because it was what Starfire would have wanted, but their efforts were futile. When Starfire disappeared, it was like someone pulled out the card that was the base for a card tower. Robin became darker, reclusive and almost never stopped researching on the villain of the week. If he wasn't researching he would be trying to pound his sorrow away in the gym. When he was on any of his missions, he become bloodthirsty, desperate to bring all villains to justice. He stopped at absolutely nothing. Beastboy and Cyborg became quieter, as they no longer told jokes or fought about videogames. Raven stayed in her room all day, meditating to keep her emotions under control. Although she hated to admit it, Starfire was like a sister to her. Soon enough, she lost her mind, and they were forced to send her to the asylum. Cyborg's batteries ran out, and he never bothered to get them fixed. The Titans were no more. Robin packed his stuff, and found a cave, which reminded him very much of the one he shared with Batman. This was where he lived, his headquarters, for the past twenty years.

Slipping on his dark suit he went downstairs to find something to relieve the tightness in his throat. He wasn't going to cry. No, he was going to be strong. It was all in vain because his vision was becoming blurry, and he was as grateful for the black strip that covered his eyes.

'She always wanted to see my eyes so badly. I should have at least shown her once. But no, I had to just go and tell her that I didn't trust her enough to show her them,' he grunted quietly. Robin still remembered the hope in her face when she asked him if he could ever show her his eyes. The hope had instantly faded into distress when he told her he didn't want anyone seeing them. Of course, he added that it was nothing personal, he just liked to keep his eyes hidden. Robin would never forget the look on her face, and it was a déjà vu of the time Starfire told him that Slade and he were similar. The next day, Starfire immediately put the awkward incident of the mask behind them, and was just as sweet and attentive to him as ever. He only wished that he had fulfilled her request.

'What was that saying again? You never realize what you have until it's gone,' he hated that quote more than anything because it rang true to him.

Robin took a long sip of the coffee, savoring the bitter taste. It was just the way he liked it, concentrated with a ratio of six tablespoons to one cup of water and no sugar added. Robin sank down on the chair, chugging the coffee, trying to dampen his own taste buds, as if this would dull his pain. When he was only a little boy, he lost the only two people he ever loved, his parents. Then twenty years ago, he lost the only girl his heart belonged too. She was the one that supported him, and the only one who Robin ever confided in. When Robin shut the whole world out, bottling up his pain inside, it was she who comforted him. Now when he brought a criminal down, it wasn't just for his parents. It was also for Starfire.

'Is she even still alive,' he thought miserably. 'Don't think that! You'll see her once again. Everything will be alright. You'll tell her how you feel. Everything will be back to normal.' Deep in his heart though, he knew he was never going to see her again. Once again he was truly alone.

It wasn't like Robin had never been alone before. When his parent's died, he felt truly alone, until he forged an irreplaceable relationship with Batman. Then when he finally felt it was time for him to spread his wings to fly, he formed the Teen Titans. Although, there were times when he "chose" to walk alone, Starfire would always be right at the sidewalk waiting for him. She was the only one who would stand at his door in the middle of the night, trying to assist him. Never did she think of any personal gain. Starfire just wanted to help Robin, to make him happy. She always managed to pull him out of his obsession. After Robin grew weary of walking along that dark street, Starfire always offered to walk with him. Robin regretted every single time he slammed the door in her face, every single time he said something to make that beautiful smile of hers drop. It was too late now. She was never going to know how much he loved her.

Groaning in frustration he slammed his mug down. It broke into tiny shards, and when they hit the table there was a little 'ping'. Ironically, these were a reminder of his broken dreams. He remembered one of his secret little fantasies he always had. Never would he admit it to Cyborg or Beastboy, but he always dreamed of marrying Starfire. He dreamed of taking her home, being able to run his hand through her hair whenever he wanted too, kissing her every morning, and waking up with her in his arms. Always he had his doubts about whether or not she really loved him back, or if she was just being charitable to him because he was pathetic. He had to admit that just having the chance to tell her how he felt would be enough for him. If she didn't love him, at least he would have a reason for his broken heart, but this was excruciating. Never would he know whether or not she really loved him. His thoughts were so focused on his remorse that he almost didn't hear the bell ringing, signaling that the city needed him.

'Not on this day!' he thought furiously. 'Whoever it is! He's going down!" Vengeance was his goal when he ran out the door, ready to bring whoever it was down.

Robin perched himself on a roof, looking out over a distance. His long ebony locks floated in the wind, whipping past him. He stood crouched forming a dark silhouette. The sky was gray, appropriate for the anniversary of Starfire's disappearance, he thought. This criminal who dared to make trouble on this day for him was going to pay. He scanned with his eyes, until he saw a man dressed in gold with a clear helmet on his head, who seemed to be fighting with a young girl. Robin leaped down to get a closer look. Recognizing it was Warp, Robin let out a scowl. He was the reason Starfire wasn't by his side. He drew out his bo-staff ready to send Warp into another dimension. Out of the corner of his eyes, he could see the girl whom Warp was fighting with. She had beautiful red hair with sparkling green eyes, and looked awfully familiar. On her, was a purple mini skirt, boots, and a matching purple top.

'It can't be!' he thought, almost choking on his own breath and the smile that was spreading fast across his face. This was just too perfect, too good to be true. Starfire was back!

Noticing that Warp was getting ready to blast Starfire, Robin immediately leaped into action. Letting out a battle cry, he cornered Warp, replicating everything he did with the punching bag just a few hours earlier. Warp narrowly escaped by sliding through the floor. Robin let out another battle cry as he landed effortlessly on his feet. He noticed Starfire was following him curiously, trying to get a good look at her mysterious rescuer.

"It's good to see you again," he remarked. That was definitely the understatement of the year. She didn't look a day older from the last time Robin had seen her, and Robin felt a familiar nervousness as well as the same fire burning within him. Her eyes, those glittering emerald jewels, were still filled with the exact same innocence. Robin only hoped she was going to accept him.

"Robin?" she asked, hopefully. Hearing the glee in her voice, his fears were quenched. She was more than happy to see him.

"I haven't used that name in a long time, call me Nightwing," he replied, stepping out of the shadows. His Star was back, back by his side. He had been found and no longer would he ever have to, or want to, walk the lonely roads.


End file.
